[Shout out to jonathan b. and Cloudy!]

  Hollywood What If Chapter 105

  When Kazir heard that 20th tury Fox was ied in making a sequel to Napoleon Dynamite, he expected to be asked to direct or write the movie.

  Since Kazir had no idea how the movie would turn out, he decided to take on the script instead. He avoided the possibility of failure, and that was not a bad thing.

  For a person like him, his knowledge of the future was his stroalent. Not his calm mind nor his strong memarding movies.

  So Kazir decided to take a ce with the script this time... He was inspired by The Hangover.

  In the plot he created, Napoleon and Pedro went to Las Vegas to visit Deb. They were older and had graduated from high school.

  To be ho, Kazir had no idea what he was doing... The truth was that Kazir had no swriting talent. So he hired a bunch of writers to fill in the plot holes. He made sure that the writers had experien writing edies, just to be sure.

  This is how the script of Napoleon Dynamite was created. Las Vegas had its bad side, but it also had a good side. Uhe Hangover, where the movie emphasized drugs, crime and prostitution (sort of), the script of Napoleon Dynamite was mild.

  Every few mihere were edy sketches and funny lio keep the movie eaining.

  Napoleon Dynamite and Pedro Sanchez entered a o and won a lot of money betting on horse races. Because of this, the o manager noticed them and tried to cel their money.

  Napoleon and Pedro had no choice but to run to get away from them.

  Las Vegas was huge and Napoleon found a pce to hide. He was caught in a live TV show where he had to do daeps... Aarted doing those silly dances again.

  He didn't know that his uncle and his brother were actually watg the show and they went on stage to stop Napoleon. It was hirious, or so Kazir thought.

  Si was live, Napoleon became famous in just one day and the o decided to let them leave with their money.

  That's right. That's the whole plot of the movie...

  20th tury Fox was actually skeptical about the script. Tom Rothman in particur felt there was another way to make it better. Tom Rothmaly hired writers to do another version of Napoleon Dynamite II, just to be sure.

  However, their suspis were alyed when The Hangover was released.

  Napoleon Dynamite II and The Hangover had some simirities, both were set in Las Vegas.

  20th tury Fox decided to go with this script. They trusted Kazir's creativity.

  "I didn't expect this to be the result."

  Kazir looked around and found that most of the audience had a great rea to the sequel of Napoleon Dynamite. They were all smiling, happy with what they were seeing. They were even ughing.

  "What?"

  He asked himself. In his previous life, Kazir always wrote noir and horror films. The seriousness and depressing tone of noir films. The terrifying shod deafening scream of horror films. All of his films were either noir or horror. He never went into edy or a.

  When he wrote Napoleon Dynamite, Kazir uood that it was not his real creation. He just pgiarized it. He was a thief, a bastard.

  But this time it was different. The idea was all his. Sure, it was inspired by The Hangover, but it was still something different.

  Kazir felt like he was on to something big.

  "Kazir, are you okay?"

  Reese suddenly asked him worriedly, toug his arm.

  "Huh?"

  "You're g."

  Kazir touched his fad realized that he was indeed g. In the midst of a long round of appuse from the audience, Kazir shed tears.

  .........

  ......

  ...

  June 5, 1997. It was Thursday night. Actually, it was almost midnight.

  The summer schedule was alacked with blockbuster movies and the month of June was not so easy.

  The heavy movies released today were Air from Walt Disney and Napoleon Dynamite from 20th tury Fox.

  The two movies were released at the same time and it was obvious that the collision was going to happen.

  "Kazir, I didn't expect you to stay. I thought your job was already over after you passed the baton to Hugo Lameire."

  Kazir could not sleep. Not with this film attached to him.

  "Tom, don't be like that. Napoleon Dynamite is like a child of mine. I want it to succeed."

  Kazir gnced around the er. He found Hugo Lameire sipping expresso vigorously. His anger was long gone and only nervousness remained. Right now, Hugo Lameire was hoping that the movie would be a hit. Otherwise, all the promises Warner Bros had made him would disappear. Everything depended oe of Napoleon Dynamite II. So he was nervous instead of angry.

  "Sir, the result is here."

  "Give it to me."

  Tom Rothman got the stats.

  "3.8 million. Not bad."

  This was already within their expectations and Tom Rothman didn't have a problem with the result. After all, there was another heavy movie ing out today.

  "How about Air?"

  Kazir asked.

  "It says here that Air made 4.3 million."

  Air had Nichos Cage in it, and his box office appeal was very strong at this time. Kazir was expeg this situation.

  What her Kazir Grey nor Tom Rothman expected was that Napoleon Dynamite's vibrancy would be strong.

  Juh, 1997. Friday. Napoleon Dynamite got 11.32 million, while Air got 7.21 million.

  June 6. Saturday. Napoleon Dynamite made another 13.50 million while Air made 9.62 million.

  June 7. Sunday. Napoleon made another 8.78 million. All told, Napoleon Dynamite grossed 33.61 million on its first week.

  As for Air, it earned 8.08 million. For three days, Air has earned 24.91 million.

  -- Pah!

  "What's going on here?"

  Michael Eisner smmed the neer down oable in anger. He was furious.

  Why was he angry?

  Because the iment in Air was huge, yet it was beien by a small-budget edy!

  The produ cost of Air alone was 80 million! On top of that, they ied 15 million in advertising!

  "S- Sir..."

  The secretary jumped when she saw the old mahing with anger.

  "... tact Kazir Grey and ask him if Grey Pictures is ied in w with Walt Disney."

  He took a deep breath and decided to calm down. In his opinion, Kazir Grey was the one responsible for the film's success. Naturally, he wao squeeze the man's creativity before it dried up. Warner Bros and 20th tury Fox mao profit from him, so why not Disney?

  "Y- Yes." The secretary stuttered.

  It was only the first week, but Michael Eisner already khat the rampage of Napoleon Dynamite II was only the beginning.