Chapter 35

  Given the pretty obvious circumstances, Elon just burned through 12,328 profanities and vulgar phrases in his head in the last second. He carved out that second from his packed survival schedule just for this task. It was his top priority, shoving aside critical questions like: “What do I do?” “Where do I run?” “Why bother running?” or “What’s that stuck in Ksafraks’s teeth?” to the back burner. For this urgent business, he cranked his mental processing speed up dozens of times. In that time, he used the verb “rip off” 1,374 times, “sawing off” 987 times, “tear out” 988 times, “push in” 1,423 times, and plenty others in the same vein. All, one way or another, tied to human anatomy. Oddly, every sentence was in the future tense. From this, you might guess our hero was pissed about his current life situation. Well… I think that’s a spicy note to wrap up the intro and pass the mic to the star of our show. [Applause]

  …

  - FUUUUUUAA...

  …

  - Ahem… Apologies for our hero. Seems he’s dedicating a second second to this undeniably thrilling activity. But who am I to judge? Alright, given the circumstances, we’re switching up the format of our show. While Elon’s still out of his damn mind, I’m Joe, and with me is my colleague Jay.

  - Good evening.

  - Hi, Jay. Good to see you.

  - Likewise.

  - We’ve got a special event today, so let me ask: what’re the odds Elon stays alive?

  - Pretty high, actually.

  - Really?

  - Question is, how many seconds he’s got left.

  - Starting with jokes, huh? No time wasted.

  - Life’s too short… You get me.

  - Hmm… Alright… So, is the situation that hopeless?

  - Yup. Bookies aren’t even taking bets on him surviving.

  - What’s your take?

  - I’m with them. Right now, we’ve got one level-70 half-demon surrounded by hundreds of hostile high-level demons. Nothing to discuss. Outcome’s obvious.

  - But we’ve seen our hero wiggle out of impossible spots before.

  - No doubt—he’s a damn talented survivor. But talent and enthusiasm only get you so far. Sooner or later, luck runs dry, and you face circumstances with no way out. His cunning’s saved him before, but forget that now. The hostility penalty auto-aggros every demon above his level. That mechanic only hits other races, so to counter it, he’d need to become a full demon.

  - Is that even possible?

  - Far as I know, nope.

  - So, no intrigue?

  - Nah. Doesn’t dampen the public’s interest, though. Bookies are taking bets on how many seconds he’s got left and who lands the killing blow.

  - What’s your prediction?

  - Gotta admit, I bet on death at eight seconds.

  - Well, good luck.

  - Thanks.

  - Back to the show. Looks like our hero’s finally moving.

  - More like he’s being forced. A second and a half is too big a head start. Wasting time in this situation? Reckless.

  - Agreed, colleague. As expected, Ksafraks is the first to attack Elon.

  - Yes, bookies pegged death by Ksafraks as the likeliest outcome.

  - But you don’t buy it.

  - No. I just think he’ll last eight seconds. Elon might dodge the first attacks. He’s shown his skill against Kalh, who, by the way, was one of hell’s hundred fastest demons.

  - Yeah, beating Kalh caused a real stir.

  - Luck played a part. Many say fortune’s way too kind to him. Not my place to comment—there’s a committee for that.

  - Whoa… That was close. Ksafraks’s sword missed Elon’s neck by millimeters. Heard he’s got some interesting magic.

  - Yup, it’ll surprise Elon. The general’s got a human-like specialty. He’s a magic swordsman, or MS, specializing in poisons. One scratch from his blade, and you die in agony.

  - He makes poison?

  - Yeah, conjures potent poison in small doses on his sword’s edge. Plus, he’s got crazy strength and speed. In swordsmanship, he’s only outdone by General Shard. Not exactly shameful.

  The story has been illicitly taken; should you find it on Amazon, report the infringement.

  - Knowing that, you still bet Elon survives the first attack?

  - Risky, I know, but I was right. Ksafraks’s style is affected by his magic. His strikes are too refined, aimed to just nick the enemy with the blade’s tip. He toys with opponents. Most can’t react to his lunges. But not Elon. With insane thinking speed, he predicted the sword’s path from Ksafraks’s stance and momentum. Result: he dodged just in time. Now, as expected, here comes his signature move.

  - Elon zaps Ksafraks right in the eyes with lightning! He’s blinded for a moment. Meanwhile, two demons approach from the right flank. Elon spots them. He slides between Ksafraks’s legs, ending up behind him. Demons from the left flank move in too. They raise their swords, but… What? Ksafraks decapitates both in a flash! What’s happening?

  - Check his leg.

  - Right! Elon stabbed his dagger into Ksafraks’s leg, causing arm muscle spasms! Incredible! Ksafraks’s next swing slices other attackers in half. But… a hell general won’t stand for this. He quickly figures it out and kicks Elon flying.

  - Ha, even that worked in the kid’s favor.

  - Elon’s body slams into the demon crowd, knocking them down. A small gap opens, but new enemies fill it fast. A massive hammer swings at Elon’s head, but he dodges, letting another demon take the hit. It’s like a hydraulic press—nothing left but a wet spot.

  - Nasty sight.

  - Elon’s back on his feet. More fighters attack from behind, but a second hammer swing meant for him takes them out! The huge demon wielding that giant weapon is none other than Gnat, the blacksmith—one of the physically strongest demons on the outer arc. Rumor is he could open the gate.

  - Oh, come on… Don’t buy everything demons say.

  - Swinging that weapon carelessly, he’s killed five already without touching his real target!

  - Compared to Ksafraks’s finesse, dodging Gnat’s swings is no sweat for Elon. He’s even positioning himself so the next hit takes out more enemies.

  - Brilliant work! But how long can he keep this up? Fifth second’s almost done.

  - Looks like I was right—demons won’t take him down that easy.

  - Things could change! Ksafraks charges back in. He’s aiming for a stab from behind. Another lightning flash to his eyes! Unbelievable! Elon shot a bolt right from his ass. How’s that even possible!?

  - Simple, really. He saw Ksafraks coming in Gnat’s pupils’ reflection.

  - But why from there? I thought elemental mages need hands as conduits.

  - Not mandatory, just easier. Hands are the most coordinated body part for focusing mana.

  - Fascinating, but Ksafraks isn’t slowing down! He’s charging! And—whoa—Gnat’s giant hammer slips from his hands, flying right at him! Insane!

  - Unreal… Did you see that? Elon zapped Gnat’s arm just before. Not a random shot. Gnat’s resistance blocks most damage from Elon’s current magic power. But he hit the wrist extensor muscles. They twitched, loosening Gnat’s grip, and the hammer flew. This show’s beyond my expectations.

  - Impact! Ksafraks hits the ground, but he’s barely hurt.

  - No doubt, a lord’s general isn’t going down easy, but that’s enough to piss him off.

  - Meanwhile, Elon slips from Gnat’s reach and stabs his dagger into his groin. Then he wrecks Gnat’s organs with magic, bypassing his aura.

  - Yikes… Brutal…

  - Can’t argue… Not for kids. The fight rages on. Elon tries slipping through a gap in the demon ranks. He’s moving fast. Isn’t he worried his muscles will give out again?

  - Sure is. That’s why he dumped some points into strength.

  - Makes sense?

  - Yes. Stronger muscles handle stronger impulses.

  - We’ll see soon. What about the other points?

  - Predictably, he put them into agility and mana. He’s burning mana on thinking and speed boosts. At this rate, it’ll run dry in about ten minutes. If he lives that long, which is unlikely.

  - Don’t rush to conclusions—the fight’s still on. Elon’s dodging through demons like a starving alley cat. He makes them trip over each other, occasionally zapping eyes with lightning. His body manipulation technique causes havoc. By piercing skin, he bypasses resistance and aura, controlling their nervous systems. In this crowd, demons can’t figure out what’s happening. Our half-demon’s smartly using their numbers against them. What do you think of that tactic?

  - I’m floored. I lost my bet, but I don’t care. I’m rooting for him now, haha. Not my usual style.

  - Gotta agree. Look, the body count’s climbing. Stunning… Elon’s only directly killed a few. Oh… Another demon just offed himself. New trend?

  - Elon’s just saving mana. Easier to send a small pulse to a hand than burn loads on direct damage.

  - Ruthless efficiency.

  - Who knows… In China, they made relatives of executed prisoners pay for the bullets.

  - You saying our hero’s from there?

  - No. If he was, he’d be a millionaire on the surface, churning out kettles. No magic needed.

  - Haha. Jokes aside, while the general’s recovering, others get a shot at the kill.

  - Plenty of notable demons left. Like Orak the Bony. Loves shooting volleys of sharp bone shards.

  - Interesting guy. Writes decent poems about human meat.

  - Yeah, I read them. Too creepy for me. And… he just got his head sliced off by that katana-looking sword guy trying to hit Elon.

  - That’s Ilmator. Always carries that blade. They say he forged it for a hundred years, chasing perfection.

  - Perfection of what? Idiocy?

  - Don’t be harsh. Demons don’t have much entertainment here.

  - Can his sword cut space itself now?

  - Any sword cuts space. It’s space.

  - I know, just joking. But here’s a question: what happens if that sword gets hit by Mogus’s icy blast, like just now, then a fiery…

  - It broke.

  - Yup… Tough luck, Ilmator. Plenty of time to forge a new one.

  - Or not. Was that his skull melting in lava?

  - What a shame.

  - The fight’s dragging on. Twenty seconds down. Can’t wait for the resolution.

  - Agreed. Today we… Whoa… Did you hear that?

  - Yeah, Ksafraks is pissed. That was his roar.

  - Lightning-fast sword swings, and dozens of dead demons. The general’s carving a path to his enemy. Is that normal? Is the hostility penalty that strong?

  - No, that’s his personal rage.

  - EVERYONE, BACK OFF!!! – Ksafraks bellowed.

  - Looks like he wants to end this nonsense and needs his minions to clear space.

  - You’re right, but Elon’s retreating with them, haha. He’s literally hiding behind demons, sowing chaos with his crazy techniques.

  - Ksafraks is losing it. He’s chopped a couple dozen into salad without even grazing Elon. Can’t see him in the crowd and swings blindly, which our hero’s shamelessly exploiting.

  - This can’t last forever. Demons aren’t infinite.

  - Another slash—three more down. Their ranks are thinning. About thirty left standing in this part of the square. Total bloodbath. But… Wait… Where’s our hero?! He’s gone! Did he vanish?

  - Maybe Ksafraks got him?

  - Could be, but no body either… Did he escape this hell?

  - No clue. I’m digging for info, but nothing. Looks like he’s really not on the square.

  - Unbelievable… Did he make it out? Mind-blowing! A real sensation!

  - Sensation’s an understatement. But we’ll need a week for final results. That’s it for today’s broadcast. Thanks for joining us, and all the best!

  - Ugh… Shame. But I believe our hero’s alive. After that fight, he’s gotta be pumped.

  …

  AAAH!!! AAAH!!! AAAH!!! Fuck!... Fuck!... Fuck!... Fuck!... Fuck!...

  This is fucked… Totally fucking fucked…

  I lay on the forge floor, eyes bulging like I’m the god of junkies. Heart pounding so hard I couldn’t hear anything else. Wheezing like a busted vacuum. Thump… Thump… Fuuu… Shit… Hey, breakfast, long time no see… Damn… I’m shaking like a hardcore alcoholic. Fuck… I’m alive… I’m alive… I’m alive… Don’t cry… You’re a man… You’re a maaa…