Relwing

  1.58: Sentai BornI forced myself upright with the hardest sit-up of my life, wobbling into a seated position on Akuchi’s gigantic shoulder just to see what everyone was gaping at. My gaze slid briefly to Natalia-sama. Despite her visible exhaustion, pride radiated from her entire being like pure sunlight.

  Natalia-sama practically danced across the workshop toward the veiled mannequin standing under the spotlight. With a graceful, dramatic sweep of her arm, she flipped the veil away…

  … And what was beneath glittered like chrome dipped in starlight.

  My jaw dropped so hard I felt it in my spine.

  ………

  …………………

  “Another sentai costume?!” I squawked.I didn’t recognize this one at all. Maybe I’d fallen behind in my sentai backlog these past few months.“I-is this from a new show?” I blinked repeatedly, hoping I’d missed a season.

  Natalia-sama twirled around the mannequin, presenting the suit as though she were unveiling the Holy Grail.“No, no… it’s not from a show. Seeing you in the Magiranger costume earlier… completely inspired me! Truth be told, I started designing it after you left.” She clenched her fist triumphantly and beamed.

  “At least tell me there isn’t a built-in billboard on the backside again,” I begged, already bracing for trauma.

  “Ahahahaha! Yes—that was a terrible mistake, I will admit.”Her ugh went a little too high.“It may have backfired on me. This time, I kept the logo very simple!”

  She tapped the chest proudly.

  There, on the silver bodysuit, a complex bck sigil sprawled across the torso—intricate, dramatic, beautifully rendered. It was yokai-themed: vampires, kitsune, swirling shadow-creatures, ancient shapes I could barely name. The artwork was stunning. When I leaned in, I spotted a tiny oni with a club and a perpetually irritated face.

  …Was that representative of Rui-chan?!

  “Um… where is the actual logo, Natalia-sama?” I asked carefully.

  “Oh, no no—pull your vision back a bit. Look carefully. Then you’ll see it.”She gestured proudly, patting the pattern.

  I tilted my head, focusing…And then it clicked.

  ナタリア

  Her name was spelled vertically down the chest.Beautifully hidden in the picture. Elegantly integrated into the yokai design. So subtle I completely missed it at first gnce.

  The helmet, however… was creepy.It looked like Noh-face had applied to be a superhero. There were two bck, empty eye-windows. A wide-open yawning maw for the mouthpiece.

  At least a silver crest sat on the forehead, breaking up the eeriness. It gave the whole thing a slightly heroic, almost Gundam-like aesthetic. The matching boots, gloves, and belt pouch all blended seamlessly with the suit’s silvery sheen. It even had a cape and mantle like the previous set… both fluttering gently as if preprogrammed with dramatic wind effects.

  It had built in pouches on the belt, tough enough to protect my phone from being destroyed in combat. That meant that my stupid fanny pack wouldn’t be needed anymore.

  “Now everything is prepared!” Rui announced, practically vibrating with excitement. “Your work is so amazingly inspired! This is going to work perfectly. When Susumu wore that costume earlier, he became a true sentai hero!”

  She said it with complete sincerity.

  “You could say it worked because he was a yokai,” she went on, “How did that happen? In my opinion, I think it was more than that. The costume stimuted his conscious power. He got into character… just like Akuchi. His spiritual energy manifested because he believed in the role!”

  Akuchi gave Rui the most exhausted, extremely wry, please stop talking smile imaginable.

  Another pretty pn gone wrong…I sighed. Rui’s theories were always so… juvenile.

  “Why the sigh?” Natalia-sama looked immediately stricken, her hands csped to her heart. “Don’t you like it? This is my magnum opus. My life’s masterwork…”

  She looked one second away from tears.

  Your… greatest creation? This? Really?I thought about all the exquisite dresses and outfits she’d already made. Her craftsmanship was genius-tier. It showed in everything she made. But this… this sentai suit… this was supposed to be the most precious creation of her entire life?

  Natalia-sama’s eyes suddenly brimmed with tears.Her sunny blue eyes turned into shimmering, trembling puppy eyes.

  Oh crap… not those eyes. Don’t do that to me!

  Bracing myself on Akuchi’s shoulder, I pushed off in a smooth flip and nded… somehow… on both feet right in front of the mannequin. The impact rattled every bone I owned, but I forced a confident grin and touched the sentai suit reverently.

  “Of course I love it! Natalia-sama, you’re a genius! I love you!”

  The clouds evaporated instantly from her eyes. She lit up with radiant joy, grabbed me, and kissed me… thoroughly, dramatically, indisputably.

  My entire body froze.My cheeks detonated into atomic-red heat.My brain bluescreened.

  Kyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!

  “Are you done yet?” Rui stomped behind us, sounding every bit the oni she truly was.

  “We’re done!” Natalia-sama chirped, pulling away, glowing with satisfaction.She cpped her hands once.“Now get those clothes off, Susumu!”

  “Whaaaaaaaaaaa!?”I snapped toward her so fast my neck nearly cracked. My head felt like it was going to explode from the blood rushing to it.

  Ume inhaled sharply.She lifted her hands to her cheeks, blushing fiercely.

  “It smells so good!” she squealed, squirming like she was vibrating internally.

  Akuchi copied her with much less nuance, sniffing the air like a confused dog.“Um… I smell Natalia’s perfume… faintly… It is kind of nice.”

  Rui rolled her eyes at Ume so hard it was audible.

  “Get those clothes off, posthaste!” Natalia-sama repeated…and without waiting for my permission, immediately began tearing my clothes off herself with terrifying enthusiasm.

  My brain imploded a second time.Ume swooned happily in the background like this was the culmination of her life.

  I see… No heroic transformation sequence for me.No dramatic henshin pose.No glowing background… explosions… or swirling light.

  Well, of course this wasn’t a real sentai show!!! I couldn’t transform for real…

  OH KAMI.

  They had all seen me naked.

  My whole face ignited again. I swear even my blood detonated in my head. Ume’s knees went wobbly, and she had to brace herself against the nearest mannequin, swooning.

  When my brain rebooted, I was already fully suited-up with the helmet on.

  My vision was far better than in the Magiranger outfit from the Halloween party. This one was professionally made for the purpose of fighting. That showed. The visor was made of one-way gss, tinted slightly like sungsses. I could see perfectly clearly… but from the outside, the eyes were a bck, reflective void.

  Natalia-sama really was a genius. A terrifyingly genius designer.

  Akuchi helped me to my feet, supporting me with her arm.I gave her my best noh-smile… because with this helmet on, my face was basically a noh-face again.

  “Can you stop that stupid Amazoness act already?” Rui snapped, jumping high enough to sm her small hand onto Akuchi’s head with surprising force.

  “Eeep!”Akuchi flinched…POOF.…instantly transforming into Reiko-chan.

  I noh-gaped at her so hard I could feel my jaw hitting the inside of the helmet.

  “We’re serious now, I guess,” Akuchi murmured, tilting her head.

  “Yes,” Rui agreed, crossing her arms. “We are. And since our preparations are now complete… Natalia, are you joining the fight tonight?”

  Natalia-sama stretched dramatically, then spped my armored backside with familiar affection.“Well, I am exhausted after creating my baby here,” she purred. “But I gave it everything I had.”

  She beamed at us with a triumphant wink and even delivered a sparkling thumbs-up.

  Somehow… that energized me more than any mystical training could.

  “LET’S DO THIS!” I shouted, throwing my fist upward as my cape billowed behind me like there was a dramatic explosion of silver behind me.

  Ume csped her hands under her chin. “I’m curious… what will you call this sentai series, Natalia?”

  The mood cracked instantly like cheap gss.

  Natalia-sama pressed a thoughtful finger to her cheek. “Hmm… I’m not completely sure, but I do have an idea.”

  “Tell me!!” Ume bounced like a caffeinated fairy. “It’s probably amazing!”

  “I agree… but please be serious,” Rui muttered through gritted teeth.

  “What is it?” Akuchi chimed in brightly.

  Natalia inhaled, raised her arm dramatically, and decred…

  “Yokai Sentai Noh-man!”

  I fell over.

  Noh-man?!No man?!Because I have a girl’s face and voice now?!

  That was… that was—

  An extremely atrocious pun.

  My helmeted head thunked against the floor in the most defeated way possible.

  Relwing